Pugs Crap Page 2
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Me
Well i'm 44 last time I had a Birthday been Riding(falling off)Motorbikes for 25 Years so far,plan to carry on the Riding(not the Falling off)bit unit i can't either,walk,operate the bike Properly(sometimes screw up that even now)or find something better to do(no chance of that then)or lose my Licence due to the "Saftey Camera's" i:e
Those wonderfull Grey road saftey Objects that seem to be Multiplying everywhere.
Owned about 40 Odd bikes all of em from Japan,did wan't a British Bike in my Early days an still do.If I won the Lottery tommorrow i'd by a "Hurricane".

The History or How I've Survived so far
they say everyone can Remeber where they were the Day J F Kennedy got shot(that's of course if you were born then or before coz after, well who the fuck knows).The Day I can Remeber most was 7/12/1977.
That was they Day I could Legally Ride on the Road an Picked up my first Motorbike.A Brand new RD125DX Yamaha £440 on the road plus Insurance £110 Fully Comp,so all you kiddies out there paying god know's how much are know chokin I suppose.
Should have been a Happy Life from then but it wasn't only 3 Months later an i'm in fuggin Hosptial an to this Day I have No recollection of what actually Happened,One Minute i'm Riding my Bike an the Next i'm waking up a "Month" later!!

So after spending quite a while in hosptial and another two an a Half Years learning to walk again (up until this Point after i'd got out of Hosptial i'd been there for 12Months i'd been Riding the Bike an Strapping the Crutches to it,the Consultant at the Hosptial took a very dim view as i hobbled into his clinic on Crutches with a Crash Helmet in one hand)so i finally go back to work.A while later whilst lifting a Empty filing cabinet my Arm sort of makes a loud audible clik an I drop the Cabinet,hold my arm an I find I'm now in possesion of 2 elbows on one arm so I go Back to the Clinic an find my arm has Snapped and it's only the Plate Holding it together.Oh well anutha 2 Ops later an it's fixed.
the bike by this Stage was well an truly past its sell by Date as i wasn't really able to look after it to well due to lack of finances and me not being the kind of person who likes cleaning things so I got rid of it an Bought a cheap hack.A H**da CD175 for £25.
Well that lasted quite a while until I hit a diesel patch coming home from work one night as I slid down the Raod 2 things sprang to mind 1,this time it won't hurt(it didn't)2,the Bikes gonna hit that Kerb(it did)well after I got up I picked the Bike up sat on it an it still ran ok,but there was a slight Problem,wiv the Bars straight the front wheel was like 35 degrees to the Left so I had to ride it home like that an get on Public transport till I sorted out another bike.
Had some Good News the Insurance Company finally coughed up some Money for the 12 Month N.H.S Holiday i'd had in 78 so I rang a mate up who Owned a Bike Shop an Asked if he had any of them Yamaha 250lc Bikes in stock,he had an I picked up my Brand new Bike that same evening.
What with having a shed load of Pennys I Quit my job on the Spot as in "see yer later" rang me brother up an we got on our Bikes an rode around together for a while.


If anybody is bothering to read this far don't go out with your Brother or Sister on another Bike why.Well its kinda Nervewracking when there in front and I was always worried that he might get hurt or something the Other Reason was he don't brake that well the Dopey B'stard he hit my 3 Day Old Bike up the Arse an smashed his up aswell in the Process.So sum £1100 later I'd rebuilt mine and paid to get his fixed aswell (even though I really wanted to kill him)why well he's my brother an i'd do anything for him,just wished he could stop quicker that's all.
Not long after i'd finally run the Engine in I finally did 100mph,kinda like a landmark moment supposdely the first time you do that,me well I just wanted to go Faster (not on a public road officer honestly)always wanted to do that and the speed bug bit,so the lets see wot I can do to make it Faster stage started and through friends we tuned this poor little Yam an thrashed it Everywhere.
great fun for a couple of Years then I had the fastest Get off ever on a Bike 110mph an Broke that leg i'd done in 78 thankfully I didn't see the same Consultant otherwise he'd have Killed me(well it did take him over 8 hours to find all the bits 17 of em an put it back together)so it was a clean break only both bones an 8 weeks in plaster this time.Sold the Yam after that an said that's it with bikes(yer rite).
Not long after that I bougth my first 4 stroke a big old GS750 secondhand for £600 from the same bloke i'd got the Lc from as we wheeled it out of the shop Peter said "are you going to be ok ?" yer i'll be fine,so off I go fuk me this thing is heavy come up to a sharp left corner lean to go round eh!! well I leant it went straight on,somehow I got it round the corner an survived.Took about 3 months to get used to it but I got there in the End.
Also ended up being the First ever Bike I had an Attempt at "making it mine".
I loved that bike put 17,000 miles on it in 6 months going no where special,just rode it anytime I had a Chance.eventaually I sold it an bought what was then the Bike i'd always wanted the H**da CBX1000 big ol b'stard that was, 6 cylinders(ulp)6 Carbs(bugga to balance)an 24 Valves(took me a day an a half to shim the fuckin thing an then I still wasn't sure i'd done it rite)but what a sound an what a pile of shite in a stright line if yer rear tyre was half worn.On a road(not a Public one of course)that was three lanes wide it would weave an use all 3 of em when it was indicating 135mph an me being the Pratt wouldn't back off nope I wanted the Maxinium top seed I could get out of it.Still it was a fine lookin machine an i'd scared the living crap out of my Brother. One day he got on as a pillion an swore never ever again.so there is some justice for what you did to my poor Lc Yam you B'stard.
Of course all goord things come to an end and I eventually Killed the CBX wern't my fault though,some dozy(expleteive deleted)pulled out in front of me an that were it one very Dead CBX.


When I were a kid saw I this nutter on a Bright orange GT250 Suzuki hammering down a Road top box,panniers an a loudspeaker screaming its head off,found out later the speeker thing was a Radio cool i thought I'll Be a Dispatch Rider and get Paid for Riding Bikes I mean wot a great idea getting paid for doing something you enjoy.
So I needed anutha Bike bought yet anutha H**da this time it were a little 400/4 put a rack an top box on it an Started work on the Monday.
Some 13 years an 20 odd bikes later i finally decided that I wanted a Different Job,riding a bike 12/15 hours a Day kinda kills yer enjoyment a lot,so come the weekend you don't wan't to ride a Bike !! but I did have fun an some of the Bikes I'd used were even more fun to ride


Plus you get to meet some rite Nutters on the Circuit and some rite Arseholes then there's also the funny side.On one occasion I had a Cash Job going from London To Southend paying good Money so off I go i'd only been with the Company a Few Weeks (in the Courier Game you go to whichever company you can get the most money from and in the Time I was there i'd change company's Every year) and the Bike was a Bit Ropey anyway i'm on the A127 about 12 miles from southend an this Bike was gettin slower an slower so I just wound the throttle further an further till Eventually "Bang" the Motor Blows up throws a Rod threw the Cases and loads and loads of oil over me the Bike and the Rear Tyre,so I whip in the Clutch and cost Gently to a Standstill as there was no way i'd use the brakes in case the Oil was on the back tyre.After surveying the Damage and looking at a Chunk of Metal the Size of a Golfball (turns out that was once a Piston) I casually walk back to a Garage i'd just Passed and Ring in to Explain wot had happened.Not long after that anutha Courier Turns up and takes the Parcel and the Cash(B'stard)and Eventually the 4th Emergency service turns up.Now i'd already Explained to the nice lady from the recovery Company on the Phone that the engine had blown up and Was Fucked,but oh no do they send a trailer? nope they send a Dickhead with a Small van.So out he gets and asks wot the Problem is,so I once again explain everything to him an he says "does the Motor still run"?!!!?!!? Yes mate here you go here's the keys,so he puts the Keys in an hits the Starter Button an sure enuf the Motor Runs but there's this very Fuckin Loud Clacking Noise (basically number 2 con-rod or wots left of it hitting everything "outside the Motor")"oh I better go and get a Trailer then" ugghhhh took them Wankers four an a half hours to get me Home.
piss meself laughin about it now but at the time I wanted to Break his Fuckin Neck


13 Years as a courier in London an I survived god knows how.Yep there were a few minor spills an I did break 4 toes an a wrist but I consider myself quite lucky compared to some.
The Bikes I Used an Abused mostly H**da's had a couple of Big Suzuki's Which I loved still miss my old GS1000E so if anyone knows where HMB 51T is let us know will ya.


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